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New happies
3 January 2013 10:13 pmI had resolved at the end of 2012 to not make any unnecessary resolutions. I was comfortable with my life. Why change a thing?
Well, my mother pushed me to change. Begrudgingly, I complied in outlining some goals but just looking at them makes me depressed because I know that to fulfill them, I have to give up a lot of things I love.
It's not completely a bad thing, hearsay, since I know with all my being that complacency will lead me nowhere. It's true, yes? When you're just satisfied with the everyday goodness of your life, you're not going to actively pursue that potential greatness that you could be.
For me, I read a lot of manga, anime, and light novels, regular novels, play video games and watch movies. I'm a media maniac and devour stories like a ravenous beast. Which is why it's so easy for me to say, "Come on, what a boring character! Why can't they just strive to be the very best?" or "If you stay like that, nothing good's going to happen and there won't be a good story at all." And little ramblings like that.
When in reality, I'm exactly like that boring character that won't do a thing. I'm all talk but little action. A repeat offender of procrastination. Which is bad. Because I'm also concerned with appearances, because at least I want to be a decent person, and a brilliant multimedia-ist, in which I have too many interests that take too much time, it's overwhelming. But that's a different matter for now.
Anyways, that's why I have some difficult goals this year which requires that the relaxed life I drifted through must go. I have to part from my procrastination (mainly tumblr, damn you) in order to complete the tasks which really matter. But that means letting go of a few stray dreams, like drawing and writing, at least for now.
School is now my priority. Grades matter. Also, there's so many AP tests to study for, I don't even want to get started. Not to mention projects and SAT and ACT and all that jazz. I'm already feeling slightly suicidal writing about it.
It's hard, because a lot of this I'm doing because of parental expectations. I just want to follow my dreams. And I know one day I will. It's just that ... sometimes you have to have a little discipline before you can fly.
Well, my mother pushed me to change. Begrudgingly, I complied in outlining some goals but just looking at them makes me depressed because I know that to fulfill them, I have to give up a lot of things I love.
It's not completely a bad thing, hearsay, since I know with all my being that complacency will lead me nowhere. It's true, yes? When you're just satisfied with the everyday goodness of your life, you're not going to actively pursue that potential greatness that you could be.
For me, I read a lot of manga, anime, and light novels, regular novels, play video games and watch movies. I'm a media maniac and devour stories like a ravenous beast. Which is why it's so easy for me to say, "Come on, what a boring character! Why can't they just strive to be the very best?" or "If you stay like that, nothing good's going to happen and there won't be a good story at all." And little ramblings like that.
When in reality, I'm exactly like that boring character that won't do a thing. I'm all talk but little action. A repeat offender of procrastination. Which is bad. Because I'm also concerned with appearances, because at least I want to be a decent person, and a brilliant multimedia-ist, in which I have too many interests that take too much time, it's overwhelming. But that's a different matter for now.
Anyways, that's why I have some difficult goals this year which requires that the relaxed life I drifted through must go. I have to part from my procrastination (mainly tumblr, damn you) in order to complete the tasks which really matter. But that means letting go of a few stray dreams, like drawing and writing, at least for now.
School is now my priority. Grades matter. Also, there's so many AP tests to study for, I don't even want to get started. Not to mention projects and SAT and ACT and all that jazz. I'm already feeling slightly suicidal writing about it.
It's hard, because a lot of this I'm doing because of parental expectations. I just want to follow my dreams. And I know one day I will. It's just that ... sometimes you have to have a little discipline before you can fly.
Mashed Taters
25 November 2011 12:14 amPotatoes today, mmm.
Almost didn't reach the 40,000 word mark. But I finally made it.
Tomorrow's Black Friday, meaning I'm going shopping for a tablet! And my father also promised me a PSP if I can keep up my grades and finish my online coursework. You betcha, I will get this thing. Now just how to figure out how to get Hakuouki Limited Edition... I don't think my parents would appreciate their daughter playingdating otome games with lots of blood in it. And my mom's an anti-demon kind of person. She wouldn't like the "Demon of the Fleeting Blossom" tagline. I mean, she even thought Allen Walker was a demon! I had to explain to her that he was an exorcist but she would not hear any of it!
Anyways, off to practice some Mushishi OSTs on the piano before I go to sleep! Super excited! But I just don't know what to get my parents. =___=
Almost didn't reach the 40,000 word mark. But I finally made it.
Tomorrow's Black Friday, meaning I'm going shopping for a tablet! And my father also promised me a PSP if I can keep up my grades and finish my online coursework. You betcha, I will get this thing. Now just how to figure out how to get Hakuouki Limited Edition... I don't think my parents would appreciate their daughter playing
Anyways, off to practice some Mushishi OSTs on the piano before I go to sleep! Super excited! But I just don't know what to get my parents. =___=
Body parts
24 October 2011 10:24 pm My parents think that eating a certain body part will in turn help your body, in that same exact part. You are what you eat.
LOL, well I'll survive without eating that. Just think about what you could be if you ate frogs legs! Spider's silk! Swan's wings!
In your dreams man. In your nightmares.
Need better eyesight? Eat some fish eyes.
Need better skin? Eat some chicken skin.
Need stronger muscles? Eat the breast of a wild turkey.
Need better brains? Eat the—
And you get the idea.
Need better skin? Eat some chicken skin.
Need stronger muscles? Eat the breast of a wild turkey.
Need better brains? Eat the—
And you get the idea.
In your dreams man. In your nightmares.
(no subject)
16 May 2011 09:38 pm Feels like I've been neglecting dreamwidth for a bit.
Life is busy, blah blah blah, all the etc.
At the moment I have scanlation duties, a script to write and direct [due this week], tests to study for, an audition to practice for, and a commission to finish. Still, it's not as bad as some people.
So I'm crawling along slowly, hoping I can make it out of this school year alive.
I hope I can take driving school this summer. My mother is debating with herself and my father about it. Crossing my fingers!
This Friday I attended my school's ( orchestra banquet. Click to read more... )
Life is busy, blah blah blah, all the etc.
At the moment I have scanlation duties, a script to write and direct [due this week], tests to study for, an audition to practice for, and a commission to finish. Still, it's not as bad as some people.
So I'm crawling along slowly, hoping I can make it out of this school year alive.
I hope I can take driving school this summer. My mother is debating with herself and my father about it. Crossing my fingers!
This Friday I attended my school's ( orchestra banquet. Click to read more... )
(no subject)
8 May 2011 09:34 pmSaturday
Slept in until about 10, since this week has been wearing me out. Did just about 2-3 problems of math, practiced a bit of piano, random etc.
We visited some old friends who happened to be in town, or rather, in the town and hour away. We ate out at a great Chinese restaurant, had lots of lovely bamboo shoots and fish.
Later we went to the supermarket. Strangely, they were selling parrot fish at the fresh fish counter. It was strange. I was just walking along, blankly staring at the greys and browns and suddenly there's just this splash of blue and pink. Heh, I wouldn't have dared to eat it unless if the skin was peeled off. It was just too colorful. I did take some pictures, so I'll see if I can get them uploaded.
Sunday
Gave my mom a cd, a blend of soft/summery anime soundtracks.
Had to finish the homework I didn't finish yesterday.
Drew something not in cartoon style. It took 1 hour to get the sketch and 2 hours to do some minor detail. This might take a while...
Well that's pretty much my weekend. It doesn't seem like much but I feel pretty happy.
Slept in until about 10, since this week has been wearing me out. Did just about 2-3 problems of math, practiced a bit of piano, random etc.
We visited some old friends who happened to be in town, or rather, in the town and hour away. We ate out at a great Chinese restaurant, had lots of lovely bamboo shoots and fish.
Later we went to the supermarket. Strangely, they were selling parrot fish at the fresh fish counter. It was strange. I was just walking along, blankly staring at the greys and browns and suddenly there's just this splash of blue and pink. Heh, I wouldn't have dared to eat it unless if the skin was peeled off. It was just too colorful. I did take some pictures, so I'll see if I can get them uploaded.
Sunday
Gave my mom a cd, a blend of soft/summery anime soundtracks.
Had to finish the homework I didn't finish yesterday.
Drew something not in cartoon style. It took 1 hour to get the sketch and 2 hours to do some minor detail. This might take a while...
Well that's pretty much my weekend. It doesn't seem like much but I feel pretty happy.
Visually fine
5 April 2011 09:26 pm Ah, yesterday I was having an argument with my mother.
Apparently I spend too much time on my art. Recently, I've just opened commissions and I've set my prices really low. My first commission is only $7. Counting the hours I'd spend on it, it's less than minimum wage. My mother was pretty furious.
First she said that I never practiced my violin or piano often because I liked my art better. Which is true.
I had already told her that I would quit piano lessons next year (though I'll just play it occasionally for fun). And because she was ranting about my violin and how much I didn't practice, I just got fed up and told her that if she thought so strongly about my music, then I would just quit orchestra and there wouldn't be a need to even argue about it!
Which led to another round of arguments (but it rather felt like a lecture) about how I was always too independent and never following my mother's instructions. Which, I have to say, is pretty true, because I have 2 blogs, I scanlate, I started my commissions, and bought things online. But still, I do know what I'm doing. Or at least, I hope I do.
Things have settled for now. All that's revealed that I was a stupid, stupid person who likes to do things her own way. And that's the way I'll stay.
Though I'm not planning to ditch my orchestra next year. It's really a lot of fun, though I'm not a big fan of practicing. Yeah, I think I love my visual arts better than the fine arts.
Oh yeah, and also yesterday morning at 5 A.M., it began to thunder and rain and hail. Quite exciting, but I was half asleep and the power went out. So I was late to school, since getting ready in the morning without a running microwave is quite difficult.
Apparently I spend too much time on my art. Recently, I've just opened commissions and I've set my prices really low. My first commission is only $7. Counting the hours I'd spend on it, it's less than minimum wage. My mother was pretty furious.
First she said that I never practiced my violin or piano often because I liked my art better. Which is true.
I had already told her that I would quit piano lessons next year (though I'll just play it occasionally for fun). And because she was ranting about my violin and how much I didn't practice, I just got fed up and told her that if she thought so strongly about my music, then I would just quit orchestra and there wouldn't be a need to even argue about it!
Which led to another round of arguments (but it rather felt like a lecture) about how I was always too independent and never following my mother's instructions. Which, I have to say, is pretty true, because I have 2 blogs, I scanlate, I started my commissions, and bought things online. But still, I do know what I'm doing. Or at least, I hope I do.
Things have settled for now. All that's revealed that I was a stupid, stupid person who likes to do things her own way. And that's the way I'll stay.
Though I'm not planning to ditch my orchestra next year. It's really a lot of fun, though I'm not a big fan of practicing. Yeah, I think I love my visual arts better than the fine arts.
Oh yeah, and also yesterday morning at 5 A.M., it began to thunder and rain and hail. Quite exciting, but I was half asleep and the power went out. So I was late to school, since getting ready in the morning without a running microwave is quite difficult.
