altairtherook: (Scuro)
Today I got my polio vaccination, and my arm is quite okay, except for that soreness whenever I move. It's not very painful. In fact, I probably enjoy the pain.

I'm not saying I'm a hardcore masochist; not at all. I would very much not like to be harmed if at all possible.
However, the little reminder of the sense of touch is something that I love. And pain is a way to prove that you are still alive, and not just randomly pinching your numb epidermis in your dreams.

It's that little discomfort that keeps me awake.

Honestly, as much as I'd prefer to be more on the sadist side, I definitely belong to the masochist side. Too much sympathy, perhaps. I cannot enjoy hurting others really, unless if the person happens to be one of my siblings. If it's them, I know they will forgive me quickly. I'm probably the most 'bullied' out of the bunch of us! Even my little sister berates me.

I seem to subconsciously enjoy myself as I put on too much pressure upon myself, such as that time in November. Remember NaNoWriMo? That was absolutely suicidal. Pile 1,667 words on per day plus homework and orchestra and artistic duties, not to mention my church activities and parents' expectations, I was living in a world of chaos and unrelenting stress! Why did I even accept the challenge in the first place?! However, I'm glad I survived and did manage to write a terrible half-done novel, which by the way, the plot isn't even halfway through yet. And I still haven't touched it since December 1st.

And now I'm also in that same situation: tests tomorrow, commissions to do, things to practice for.


However, I do not enjoy emotional pain at all. It's more than I can handle. Sure I can fake a smile or stoic stare, but it's terrible!

*I'm not a masochist! I just lean towards that side more than most people.
altairtherook: (insanity)
I think I am going insane.
Should be studying for my six weeks test for Calculus tomorrow, which if I ace, will bring my grades up by a league. If not, I will be on the brink of failing the course! Darned this grading period! We usually have 6 weeks, but this period is pretty much 4, since they counted the two days of school during Thanksgiving week as well as the two days of finals next week! Are they crazy?! That's probably why my English grades have been slipping too. But I also blame it on NaNoWriMo.

And my Secret Santas! Gawd! Both are due Friday and I have yet to finalize them! A contest entry is due tomorrow, which is the same day of my orthodontist appointment and the day I'm supposed to organize the FallenSyndicate Secret Santa! What a crazy week this is! Someone save me!

And how the heck am I supposed to get presents for my friends too? All this season has been spending spending spending! I shouldn't have participated in all those gift-giving stuffs. They empty out the meager coins in my purse!

And don't get me started on the events next week! Sheesh! Outings, outings, outings! Though I am looking forward to next Friday's videogame/pancake party. Golly, that'll be enjoyable! That is, if I can get through all my finals first!


30 November 2011 09:23 pm
altairtherook: (Miyavi - 2)
(but not really, since the plot isn't even half over yet. I didn't even get to leave it at the cliffhanger I wanted to put it at. Sigh, I'll just have to wait. It has to do with Minorei though... I'm a bad mother, abusing my characters. But that is what makes the story interesting...)

I would donate but I'm broke. So broke. ;n; Need more commissions.
altairtherook: (Miyavi - 1)
Gawd I'm almost done! I'm at 48352 words right now! One more day to go!
So tired.
Had orchestra rehearsal.
Then homework.
Then dinner.
Then I have to finish typing up this! Gamut is not nearly half over yet!
Ah wells.

altairtherook: (Leo Baskerville)
Potatoes today, mmm.
Almost didn't reach the 40,000 word mark. But I finally made it.

Tomorrow's Black Friday, meaning I'm going shopping for a tablet! And my father also promised me a PSP if I can keep up my grades and finish my online coursework. You betcha, I will get this thing. Now just how to figure out how to get Hakuouki Limited Edition... I don't think my parents would appreciate their daughter playing dating otome games with lots of blood in it. And my mom's an anti-demon kind of person. She wouldn't like the "Demon of the Fleeting Blossom" tagline. I mean, she even thought Allen Walker was a demon! I had to explain to her that he was an exorcist but she would not hear any of it!

Anyways, off to practice some Mushishi OSTs on the piano before I go to sleep! Super excited! But I just don't know what to get my parents. =___=
altairtherook: (Kurokichi Kagenui)
 Got 3000+ words to post today! I've been too much of a procrastinator! Anyways, gotta go eat ramen for lunch! Be back soon, I hope.
altairtherook: (Kurokichi Kagenui)
 Today just happened to be one of those extremely tiring days, where it's hard to type up anything. I also had to catch up with the word count, because I missed yesterday's word count by a lot. Even putting on some inspirational music didn't help much.

Maybe it's because I woke up late or didn't start until later because I had a picnic or whatnot. Maybe it's because of my lack of sleep this week or the fact I feel dizzy or that I have a nasty rash on my right hand. Maybe it's the fall allergies. However, it isn't an excuse for skipping out or procrastinating on a goal that I've set. So I typed grudgingly on.

But with some help from NaNoWordSprints and YWP's dare machine, I was able to write elaborately on some scenes, releasing all the artistic energy that was pent up in me but struggled to get out in words.

I really would love to draw but there's hardly any time with NaNo. I've got some homework to finish this weekend, so I'll be busy.

At least today I got to meet some new people on Fallen Syndicate.
altairtherook: (Blind Love)
 More than halfway through with NaNoWriMo, yet I'm only on chapter sixteen! And 5/6 of my main characters have finally met each other, note even reaching a serious battle with their enemies yet. Haha, this novel will probably not be finished by the time I reach the 50,000 word goal.

However, I feel uber clever today for creating a new character, Monteith Serosity!
****A small spoiler (highlight to see): he will be not what you expect.****

I do feel so clever now, yes I do, and not just in that fact! HAHAHA!
Please shoot me now before I go completely overboard.

altairtherook: (Default)
 Writing Nano!

For some reason, writing curse words is taboo to me. I mean, it's not like I'm a goody-goody two shoes or something like that. But I somehow just can't bring myself to type those four letters of this or that. Even I will curse verbally every once in a while. But generally, I like to keep my language clean.

So if you're reading any of it, here's a general key. It's for all the stories I write, pretty much.

Fudge = F***
Granola = Sh**
Pickler = Ba***rd
Chocolatier = Bit**

I don't really use any other words than that, hahah, but perhaps more is on the way to come.

altairtherook: (Default)
 When I write, I find that I have favoritism among my characters.
Sort of.

More of when I actually write with them, I find that I write better with some characters better than others. Take my Gamut characters for example.

With Aelstro and Aragra, I write superbly well with them, easily completing the goal for that day, but when I get stuck in a rut with them, it goes extremely slow. So slow I would want to die. Luckily, I cure myself from writer's block quite easily.

With Cardanoc, Reymont, and Endere, I write averagely on them, but it's kind of hard to express their personalities without quickly falling into cliches and stereotypes. At least I can put them in interesting situations and I know exactly how they'll react.

But with Minorei, he's such a sweet character but it's so freaking hard to write anything about him! He sings, he's plagued with a disease, he's socially inept, he's indecisive! I have no idea what to write on him and the days I do write on him go really slow. Maybe it's just because he's an awkward character, or maybe it's because he hasn't been involved in much action yet. I do hope it's the latter.

Ahhhh, and the way I've just divided them is the only other of the six they've met so far. I'm almost halfway, yet none of them have met each the other half of the group yet! This is devastating!

Got about 1200 words more to go for today! Ciao!
Miyavi will sweeten my head with his songs, thank you man, now I can write happily.


altairtherook: (Default)

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